How To Accentuate Your Womanly Appearance! (Part 2 Of Embracing Femininity)
And how does vanity play into it?
Hello classic crew!
Today, I want to pick up where we left off in Part 1 of my Embracing Femininity series, “3 Ways To Be Womanly.” Make sure to check that out before continuing! In Part 1, I discussed the two parts of femininity, focusing on womanliness first. Now let’s discuss the second part of femininity: accentuating the outer differences between men and women while creatively enhancing our beauty.
Now, before we proceed, I want to clarify the difference between vanity and taking care of your outer appearance; often these two things are conflated when, in fact, they are entirely different. Taking time to enhance the feminine things about your face, hair, and figure does not make you vain.
First of all, it can be so fun to do your makeup, put on a pretty dress, or buckle on your favorite pair of heels. The creative aspect of dressing up is such a lovely part of being a woman! There’s nothing wrong with enjoying the gift of expressing ourselves through our physical appearance. Indeed, finding your style is such a wonderful way to express to others who you are and what values you hold.
Second, it’s respectful to others to try and look your best. When you’re entering a shared space, looking as if you take care of your appearance is a sign that you think of others before yourself and don’t take them for granted.
Third, I think of embracing your outer femininity as a sign that you’re grateful to God for having been made a woman. It’s like glorifying a church through ornamentation - by accentuating your feminine features, you’re glorifying God’s creation, too.
Vanity, on the other hand, takes these things to an unhealthy, obsessive level. If you won’t leave the house because you didn’t put your makeup on, or you ask people over and over again to retake photos that were for casual fun, you might need to ask yourself if you’ve crossed the line. Vanity stops you from living your life because your appearance is of paramount importance.
The truth is, vanity is about looking good for yourself and taking care of your appearance is about respect for others. If the reason you want to spend three hours on your hair and makeup each day is because you deeply care that others think you are the most attractive person in the room - that’s vanity. On the other hand, if you take the time to present yourself well, it shows respect to other people by expressing that you took the time to look appropriate in their presence. I made a video all about the difference between vanity and taking care of yourself last year - you can watch it here!
Embracing your outer beauty is such an important part of embracing femininity as a whole. One of the most important things about the idea of femininity is that it is the complementary opposite of masculinity - so accentuating those features that make women different from men is a key part of expressing femininity. By showing off the beautiful things that make us unique as women, we are showing gratitude to God for having made us women. We are glorifying His creation and thanking Him for his gifts.
So today, I want to share three ways you can accentuate your feminine appearance. It’s a beautiful thing to be a woman, so let’s take advantage of it in the best way possible!
Accentuate your best features. I’ve realized that I view accentuating my best features as a research project. Figuring out what haircut looks best for my face shape, studying what beauty products would work best for my skin type, and learning what silhouettes would flatter my body are all things I’ve taken the time to learn. I love articles like, “The best outfits for your hourglass figure” or “How to choose makeup that will last on your oily skin.” It’s fun to discover through trial and error how to look my best and express my physical femininity! I think we are often told in today’s "body positive” society that figuring out the best ways to flatter our appearance is BAD; instead, we should just do what we like and not care what actually looks beautiful. But figuring out what makes you look your best is really fun! It gives you an opportunity to be creative and accentuate your best features. Like gilding a house of worship, you wouldn’t choose ornaments that you liked but were totally out of place in the architectural structure of the building. You wouldn’t want a modernist art sculpture in the middle of a gothic cathedral, for example! Plus, learning how to make yourself look your best encourages you to find the things you love about your appearance. You will finally be able to say, “My hair is one of my favorite features, so I’m going to get an amazing haircut” or “I love my legs so I am going to wear a beautiful pair of shoes to accentuate them.” Learning what is flattering actually makes you love your body more, not less. And of course, accentuating your best features also means accentuating those things that make you uniquely womanly. There’s a reason that men love women in sundresses - it’s because they are so different from anything a man would ever wear! So figuring out what works for you is a really great way to embrace your femininity through physical beauty.
Develop your personal style. Learning how to express yourself through your clothing is one of the best ways you can accentuate your womanly appearance. One of the very first podcast episodes I did was on this very topic! You can listen here. Showing who you are through your clothing makes you a story-teller. You are sharing with the world a picture of what you like and the values you hold. For example, if you prefer a darker wardrobe, it’s likely that you will come off as slightly more serious than someone who loves big, loud patterns. These things don’t clash with your clothing being flattering - instead, placed on top of the flattering aspect of things, you can choose colors and patterns based on your preference. Another example is modesty. If you wear modest clothing, you are expressing that you respect your body and only want to share it with the one person who has made that same commitment to respect it as well. You are expressing that something kept private also keeps it holy - which makes your body a holy place. By figuring out and developing your personal style, you are expressing your inner womanliness in a physical way.
Take care of your body so you look and feel your best. It’s an amazing thing how God made men and women so physically different. Exercising, eating well, and treating your body with respect will only make your feminine body even more distinct from the opposite sex. You don’t have to be extremely muscular or toned to be feminine; you just need to be healthy! Health is the number one thing to aim for when you are taking care of your body, so getting in some daily exercise and eating what will fuel you is the best policy. An added bonus is that you will love your body more and more as you see what it does for you rather than what it looks like. The stronger you become, the more you can appreciate the body God has given you! So figure out an exercise regimen that works for you. For me, I switch off constantly between walking, strength training, and yoga. And figure out healthy foods that you actually enjoy!
Which of these are you going to try and incorporate into your life? And what are some other ways to embrace your womanly appearance? I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments, so make sure to share below!
DIGITAL MINIMALISM: Book Club Is THIS WEEK At 8:30 PM EST!
I am so excited to convene for another ZOOM book club discussion! I love being able to have a live discussion with you all.
Book club is convening this THURSDAY (5/19/2022) at 8:30 PM EST. I will send out the link for the Zoom call and it will only be available to premium subscribers. I hope that you all can make that time - now that I have a baby, I have to work around his bedtime routine!
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I'm a wife, mama, opera singer, entrepreneur, YouTuber, and your guide to becoming the classic woman you've always wanted to be! Follow me on YouTube, Instagram, and Twitter to see how! And together, let's be classic.
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This is a sweet and positive article ☺️. Looking great really is about feeling good physically and emotionally. I've been sucked into the Heard/Depp trial (not trying to be too political here 😄) but I've discovered that AH is an amazingly beautiful woman and I can see why she's been with so many famous men. She hasn't tended to herself mentally or emotionally however and her life is a blazing multi-vehicle wreck. She is vanity on steroids, blown up and toxic. Social media has allowed a rather uncomfortable window into a lot of these people's lives and I'm convinced that with rare exception they're not enviable. All this to say that tending to yourself *especially for the people who love you is an investment that's real and meaningful. 💖
#1...ummm...not all of us HAVE a "best feature." I'm 5’3”, almost 40, barely under 200lbs., and have a metabolic disorder that means that I don’t burn fat exercising or even starving myself. (I had the unfortunate opportunity to test the last part of that statement, too, after I lost more first full-time job and couldn’t even afford ramen. I’ve been proving that statement all of this year by exercising and not losing more than what dehydration would explain.) Best I can do is cover up the mannish features that metabolic condition also bestowed upon me 😑 It’s not accenting anything, just trying to de-emphasize the grossest parts 😒
I’m hoping that future articles on this topic will focus on the non-appearance aspects. Appearance depends on DNA as much as, if not more so, than anything else, but behavioral aspects are more within the reach of those of us who were never blessed in the genetics department... 😓